MPAA Rating: R (strong violent content and language, and for some sexuality and drug content)
Running Time: 89 Mins
Tagline: "Kill or be Killed "
REVIEW
Silent Trigger is not your typical action film; in fact it’s not really an action film at all. Sure, there are some scenes that due involve fighting and shooting, but the instances are very few. The only reason I picked this title up was because of Dolph Lundgren, I like the guy’s movies, they may be unoriginal but they sure are entertaining. I wish I could say the same thing for Silent Trigger, a movie that had me bored to death for 89 min.
Dolph Lundgren plays a hired assassin that gets double crossed by his employer for not following a primary objective. So, for the majority of the film, we see Lundgren an a female counterpart in the same game of death, both on the lurk for the man who hired them and killing of another target. I am sure there are many details I missed out from the movie, that’s for sure, but keep in mind I was bored to death in this film.
I wouldn’t recommend this movie, honestly I wouldn’t. the biggest problem this movie faces is the production values; the film looks like it was shot in an abandoned building. Also, I got aggravated with the constant flashbacks, at first I had a hard time knowing what was the present and what was the past. I am surprised this movie is directed by the man who directed Highlander, a director who used great editing to transition from past to present in that film.All in all, I wouldn’t suggest nor recommend this turd. Stay far away.
DVD
I first got this DVD back in 08 while I was still working for FYE. The movie was really cheap, I only paid 2 dollars for it…and with all sincerity, that’s pretty much what it’s worth.
VIDEO
The DVD brings the movie in a fullscreen presentation. From what I heard, the movie was shot in a 2:35:1 widescreen. For me, it doesn’t bother me at all, its not a good movie anyway.
AUDIO
The audio is perhaps the only good thing in this bare bones DVD, it brings both a 5.1. Surround Sound and a 2ch surround sound.
Tagline: "Who will survive? What will be left of them? Will their virginity be intact? "
Oh man how do I begin explaining this hilarious crap? You know me; I like to tell the story of how I ended up obtaining the movies I watch. So here goes the story: I was with the same friend that let me borrow Satan’s Baby Doll. We went to go to one of the F.Y.E stores that was, to our surprise, closing. So everything had to go. Me as a fanatic of horror and science fiction, I began picking every obscure title that came my way. One of those titles was ofcourse “Black Devil Doll” the cover called my attention, with its neat art cover that had some reminiscence to exploitation films. So without thinking twice I bought it. I even think this was the first movie out of the whole lot that I ended up watching that night.
Unfortunately this movie was sort of a disappointment. The main problem is that this movie is really just a porno with a puppet. For some that might mean good news, but trust me this it really isn’t. It would take me a whole research paper to put down all the nasty shit that occurs in this movie. But being that this is a review, I will list the most memorable moments. But before that, let’s talk about what Mr. Black Devil Doll wants.
The doll comes to life after a girl plays with an Ouija board. Summoning the spirit of a convicted murder. The spirit ends up trapped in the doll. The girl becomes the dolls girlfriend (man how ridiculous) but the doll wants to get it on with other gals (or as he says: bitches) luckily for the doll, his girlfriend invites some girls over. The puppet ends up banging each one, and killing them brutally one by one. Now, the death scenes, while gory, are very cheap looking and ultimately funny. Even if this movie is funny I cant give it a higher rating; I was expecting more out of the character. Then again that is just me, I know it's just a horror/comedy, not to be taken so seriously. I will leave you the trailer below so you can see how the movie is. The trailer is uncensored.
MPAA Rating: R (strong bloody violence, some sexuality and nudity)
Running Time: 95 Mins
Tagline: "Revenge never tasted so sweet."
We all know Uwe Boll is the worst of the worst when it comes to adapting video games into film. However, BloodRayne isn’t as horrible as many claim it to be. Now, don’t get me wrong, this is a crappy movie. In fact I have no idea how Boll convinced the studios to release this theatrically; the production of this movie looks downright low budget.
BloodRayne, which is based on the popular video game of the same name, tells the story of Rayne: a half human/half vampire who is seeking for Vampire who killed her mother. On her quest for revenge she meets several unimportant characters, who are also coincidentally looking for the same vampire that killed Rayne’s mother. In all, that is the whole plot summary, nothing much else to add. You really can’t ask more for a movie that is based on a videogame. Yet, the audience could ask for a better director, that I definitely agree. Uwe Boll has become the official director of all this video games adaptations...and unfortunately every adaptation is worse than the first.
The movie, in its entirety, suffers from inexplicable fight scenes-such as- Rayne and her friends randomly fighting and killing…but the question is who? And why? Who cares? Its violent, gory and entertaining…even if its poorly choreographed. Take also for example Michael Madsen, he wanders through his scenes, uninterested (don’t blame him) just waiting for his paycheck. There are various scenes were Madsen is sword fighting and he has no freaking clue what he is doing. I even think (wouldn’t be surprised) that Madsen, Rodriguez nor Kinsley, got actual training for the fight sequences. The only actress who took her role seriously was Kristana Loken. She actually did a decent job playing the character of Rayne. Her fight scenes with the two swords were pretty decent, that is actually the only reason I give this movie a 1 ½ …otherwise I would give it a lower rating.
So it did the job of entertaining me for 95 min. I couldn’t ask for more. Yes the movie is idiotic, yes it’s implausible…but people, it’s a god damn Uwe Boll movie, and what were you expecting, Underworld? I wouldn’t recommend the movie honestly, unless you are looking (like me) for a so bad its good movie; If that is the case then give it a rent or watch it online. I will leave a link to the film’s trailer, an interview with the notorious Uwe Boll, the last fight scene with Rayne, and lastly an interview with the lovely Kristana Loken.Hope you enjoyed the review :-)
Frozen in the ice for decades, Captain America is freed to battle against arch-criminal, The Red Skull.
discussion:
After two failed attempts during the 70's to bring captain America to the screen, studios thought it was time to give it one more try in the 90s. But when you see a name like Roger Corman attached to this project, you know they are not giving it their best try. For those who don't know Roger Corman, he is considered, even to this day, the king of B-movies. He has produced films like Death Race 2000, Galaxy of Terror, Humanoids From The Deep and most recently Sharktopus. Having that type of producer/director aboard this project meant that this movie is going to be pure cheese.
Comparing this movie to the other Captain America films from the 70s... I personally think that this one is in fact better. I mean not better in terms if story or style, but better in sense of entertainment. This adaptation has to be taken as comedy honestly. I couldn't watch this without laughing from time to time. It at least entertained me, as a comedy ofcourse.
Now one of the things I enjoyed most from this version was that red skull actually looked menacing. His portrayal was corny, but the makeup was actually well applied and neatly designed. Unlike the newer captain America in which he looks like a rubber red head doll. However, Hugo weaving gives a better performance light-years away from the dude on this film.
Movie begins with men arriving at a village in Italy during the 1930's. Invading later a house and abducting a child. The child who will become later Red Skull. Off the bat, from what I recall the character of Red Skull is not Italian, he is in fact German. I quickly dismissed it, again I was taking the movie for what it was, a comedy. Then after skulls transformation, 7 years pass. Steve Rogers is off to the military to serve his nation. Without much buildup or real explanation, they put him in the chair and place him under the serum. He transforms into a stronger, more agile man. Yet I see him with the same physique. In the newer adaptation he actually starts off skinny and then is transformed; Here the "transformation" is not noticeable. After the transformation he faces of Red Skull and ultimately fails. The captain is later tied up to a rocket which is launched into destination towers the White House. Somehow, just by kicking the rocket, Captain America manages to divert the rocket. It eventually lands in Alaska, where it stays buried for 46 years.
What I liked was that not much was changed from the comic or cartoon. by that I measn: He wakes up in modern times to find a very different world, His girlfriend is now an old lady, married and with children. The thing that made me laugh was the make up for the girlfriend. The worst make up I have seen to make someone look older. Yet somehow the make up for Red Skull look decent...doesn't make sense. The movie later concludes with Captain America having to find and save the president o the United States. Who is being held prisoner by Red Skull. He has a maniacal scheme under his Sleeves, but we never really understand what it is or his motives. How the Nazis are tied up into this? No clue. They mention more Mussolini and fascism then they do Nazis.
Like I Said before this movie is to be taken as a comedy. It’s just campy fun. Not to say that the 70s version wasn’t campy, it was too. But this 90s version is exceptional at being what it is: an epic cheese fest. I you want to watch the movie, I am sure they probably have a torrent somewhere online were you can view it. This movie has never been released officially to the market. You can find it on DVD in conventions or at flea markets like I did. I got it on VHS and transferred it to DVD. If you need a copy of it, leave me a comment or email me I will gladly make u a copy
"In a world ravaged by disease, he's the only cure... and the last hope for human-kind. "
Discussion
First of all, I love Christopher Lambert’s movies, specifically The Highlander movies (even if they are cheesy) Even if I do love his films; this one is not one of them. I am assuming 99.9% that Lambert was broke around the time of this movie. This is one f the silliest films about global virus and chaos I have ever seen. I mean it is so Goddamn unconvincing, it takes place in 2010 (we are now in 2011) and the future looks like 1999. I mean they do explain that a virus and some shit caused things to go weary; yet I have a hard time believing technology would be this bad. It even contradicts itself-in one scene we see Lambert seeing a third dimensional view of a crime see via computer…and then outside everyone has crappy cars wtf?
Ok, so let’s set aside my disclaimers and get to the flick. Lambert plays Detective Norman Scott. He is on the search of why a scientist was killed at point black in his own home. Through investigations we find out he was killed due to a cure he was working on. Which reminds me, if I have not mentioned it yet (which I have) this movie takes place in the future 2010 (ahem) and a virus called NES or something like that has ravaged humanity, and population has decreased. The only cure is ABSOLON, a drug that needs to be taken every day to prevent the virus from supposedly not spreading. I say supposedly because we find out later (spoiler alert, like it matters anyway) that the drug was being used by the government to control the population, so they can depend on the cure, which in fact was a similar form of the virus. It seemed the virus had disappeared years ago. Talking about government, it seems that in this future the president and leader lives in a black room with only one chair and a monitor.
This movie was just plain bad, sure i laughed at some unintentional things. I.e. Kelly Brook not being able to act for shit…even if she can’t act she is still hot, her boobs are huge by the way, and that is very important for me. Also there is a scene that seems they didn’t fix in post production: Kelly Brook talks and nothing can be heard for a couple seconds…I was laughing. The other thing is also the stunts, for some reason, since the movie came out during The Matrix craze, there’s is a big deal of slow motion and fast edits to resemble that movie…yet it fails in epic proportions. They even have the villain played by Lou Diamond Philips dress like Neo. He wears the shades, the coat, and even holds a futuristic gun, which looks like a rip-off from Robocop’s gun. I can keep going on and on about the ridiculousness that takes place in this “futuristic” film. Lastly we are supposedly being told this film perspective of a young boy who met Lambert’s character. I have a hard time believing that because he only met him for 10 min and he was merely a 12 year old…he wasn’t in the whole deal. By the end of the picture, to make matters even more hilarious, he is telling the story to his grandson. So the grandpa is either lying or he smoked a blunt…one of the two. Anyway this movie was funny, yet pretty bad. Im disappointed Lambert, I really am.
DVD
I got this DVD back in 2003 in a bin of 4 for 20 at blockbuster (yes I recall when and how I got my Movies) the thing I hate about blockbuster DVD’s though is the actual cases; I always discard them and put them in their own individual cases, or in an album…Even if they are shitty like this one. SO yeah I am not expecting this clunker to be available anytime in the future on Blu-Ray. I hope never LOL
Video
The movie is presented in 1:33:1. The aspect is for your regular non-widescreen TV, I am not surprised because this was a Sci-Fi Channel Original film…back then they didn’t bother with releasing them in widescreen. Now with the advent of HD-TV and Blu-Ray…They actually release them in that aspect. Anyway, Absolon has very low contrast, the colors never pop up. I saw this in my room, in my old TV (not HD-TV) and the whole thing had worse quality than an average VHS tape. That’s all I can say about the video.
audio
The audio is a 2 Channel surround sound. It is quite crummy and downright atrocious. The sound was very cheap. I was constantly annoyed by the cheap soundtrack that involved only a computer synthesizer. The gunfire also sounded unrealistic and mediocre.
bottom line
Bottom Line? Really? you know what to do! Avoid the turkey
Stars: Alex Pettyfer, Vanessa Hudghens & Mary Kate Olsen
Genre: Drama/Fantasy/Romance
Rating: PG-13 ( Language including some crude comments, Drug Reference & Brief Violence)
Running Time: 86min
Tagline: Love is Never Ugly
Discussion
I will admit I wasn't going to see this movie...but I heard about how bad it was and that means that my inner
"bad movie junkie" wanted to actually watch it. So I did, and I wasn't disappointed, in terms of badness of
course. To begin, I actually thought the dude looked cooler with the razor cuts and fancy tattoos; it wasn't as
if he was hideous. He actually could pull of here a new version of I am number 4… just saying.
Now into the movie: meet Kyle, a self absorbed/egotistical teenager, who so happens to be running for school president. Right in the first 3 min we see him give a little speech about how good looks makes it all work in life; without them, there is no success (according to Kyle). But, Mr. Kyle will be given a lesson by a bad little witch (Olsen) Transforming Kyle into how ugly he really is inside..Personally, like i said, he looks cooler with the razor cuts and gelly roll tats. Anyhow, Kyle has one year to find someone to accept him for how “ugly” he is and say the magic word "I Love You" and ee, and convert him back into his former normal self. How original, no? I was texting, fiddling trough my other movies while watching this turkey. The whole cast, specifically Hudghens, gavean utter bad performance. The only good performance in this movie was Neil Patrick Harris as a blind private professor. He actually brings some humor to this tepid love story. Talking about love story, the chemistry between Pettyfer and Hudghens was none existent; the two knew this was going to turn into a clunker, just kept aboard for the check. Oh and before i forget, I find it so funny how Mary Kate plays a "Witch" yet we never see her do any real magic, just a really creepy glare. she also pulls out a request for Kyle at the end, which made me go "que?" arent they suposed to be enemies?
So how exactly does this movie work as a modern retelling of beauty and the beast? Well, it doesn't! It’s
merely a poor attempt at trying to do the same thing the twilight series did. That being: reinventing old
Mythos. Twilight tried it with the vampire mythology and failed, and so did this movie. Just like this movie
came and left cinemas quickly, i am predicting it will leave the market as soon it hits to BD and DVD. So
overall this is definetly one to just skip and forget. If somehow it is shown on TV, you know what to do.
MPAA Rating: R (Strong Violence Throughout, Language and Some Sexuality/Nudity)
Running Time: 98 Mins
Tagline: "They Took His Daughter...So He's Taking Them Down"
Discussion
Remember when I said I wouldn’t buy another Steven Seagal movie…Well, I guess I lied. The movie was on sale for 10 bucks, hadn’t seen any of his DTV flicks in blu-ray...Hey, I was curious, what can I say. As we know, curiosity killed the cat, and it is very evident here. Like all the bad DTV flicks Seagal has done in the past, this one is no different; has all the same recipes for atrocity: Segal patty caking his victims (more so than before) placing a skinny double from behind when it’s not needed. And for the first time instead of dubbing Seagal’s voice, they enhance it, to make his voice sound more like a Russian..And believe me his Russian accent is as believable as his fighting (yes that is sarcasm)
Blu ray trailer
Now that I brought up Russia, Seagal plays Ruslan, native Russian (yeah right) also Ex Mobster turned crime novelist. He is to attend his daughter’s wedding, but little does he know that the guy she is going to marry is in fact the son of a big boss of the Russian Mafia. While the son isn’t involved in the mafia, his father is...And to bring his son into the mafia, the father puts in place some thugs to kill his fiancé and soon to be mother in law. Successfully, the thugs make it looks like a robbery and “so far” get away with it. But, they weren’t counting on the guy who is “Hard to kill” and while he is now “Marked for Death” he will take his “Belly of The Beast” and go “Out for Justice” (those are in fact titles of his movies)
At least this one wasn’t so convoluted, it made a little more sense than his other string of DTV flicks. Yet, the movie is still pretty bad. Especially with the fighting, I know i have said that i prefer Seagal doing his stunts, even if it means just seeing him play around with his hands…I feel like I don’t even want to see that. It is a miracle if he went back to his glory days. Meaning, losing weight, getting in shape etc…But I find that difficult to take place. Anyway, concluding, this one was just as bad or worse than Into the sun or Belly of The Beast. This guy is just getting slower and fatter by the minute, every fight sequence was painful to watch; the guy was out of breath in almost every other shot. Something as simple as running is a difficult task for the guy. To believe I used to love the guys older movies…oh well
final fight scene
The first Seagal movie I see in DVD come from FOX and its a pretty disappointing one to be honest. Even though the movie was shot digitally, the transfer failed to capture and HD power.
Video
Quality in terms of visual presentation, I must say is very disappointing. Especially for a movie that is relatively new (09) There probably only two or three scenes at the most were the colors actually pop in a three dimensional matter. But aside that, the colors are over saturated, flesh tones don’t look very realistic. For better or worse you do get to see every pore of grease and lard in Seagal’s bloated pancake face
Audio
Like the video, this 5.1. DTS HD Master Lossless Audio, even though a mouthful, has no difference to that of a regular surround mix. I have see real HD audio, and this really is not it. The gunfire sounded like firecrackers mostly. There was no real impact in the subwoofer at all. So much for “Master” Audio
Bottom Line:
Skip it, neither worth the money nor time. The only thing I will leave you, aside the trailer, is a song played in the movie that I thought was pretty bad ass…and the embarrassing final fight scene, which is brutal, but still crappy in comparison to his early work.
Stars: Ryan O’Neal, Isabella Rossellini, & Debra Sandlund
Genre: Comedy/Thriller/Horror/Drama
MPAA Rating: R (Drug & Alcohol Abuse, Violence, Language Throughout, Nudity, Profanity, and Strong Sexual Content)
Running Time: 110 Mins
Tagline:”A Story of How Dangeorus Love Can Be “
Synopsis:
{According to Fandango}
" Dougy Madden (Lawrence Tierney) pays a visit to his son Tim (Ryan O'Neal). Dougy, a tough ex-bartender, is ravaged by cancer and decides to see Tim one last time in order. But Tim is suffering both from writer's block and from the effects of too many years of drink, drugs, and sex. His sexy wife Patty Lariene (Debra Sandlund) has recently left him and disappeared. Even worse, one morning he awakens from his stupor to find the front seat of his car covered with blood and a severed head inside his drug stash. He tries to rekindle a relationship with his ex-wife Madeleine (Isabella Rossellini), now married to the psychotic Provincetown police chief, Alvin Luther Regency (Wings Hauser), and he re-acquaints himself with old prep school friend Wardley Meeks III (John Bedford Lloyd), who was also married to the missing Patty Lareine. As the murders pile up and Tim's psyche takes a beating, Dougy decides to help Tim put an end to this chaotic mess of murders"
Discussion
Oh God, Oh man, Oh God, Oh man!! It was for that one line alone that I went out and got this atrocity. I had done some research on the movie, and found out it was and still is considered as one of the worst films ever made. I have to agree, not only is this bad...but it's bizarre, demented, weird, absurd and downright "brilliant" convoluted stupidity. I know It may sound as if I am contradicting myself by saying that it's “brilliant” but here me out. The movie is so confusing and obnoxious that you will be in "awe" of how unintenionally funny it all is. To believe this was actually based on a novel. It was actually written by the same guy who directed this movie. I mean, it’s just so ironic and funny; they get the same guy who wrote the novel to do the screenplay and direct aswell and somehow still fuck it up. I haven’t seen such thing happen since Stephen King directed Maximum Overdrive, the worst adaptation to date of a Stephen King book.
The movie is so difficult to go over, Like I said, it’s just so strange and bizarre to get into. I will do my best to dissect this baby. Norman Mailer presents to us an adaptation of what he "considers" to be an instant classic (classic of cheese) I have a hard time believing the guy when he says this, he barely has a straight face, then again neither does the majority of the cast. They all act so over the top that it’s so hard to take anybody seriously. By the time the movie hit the 20 min marker I said “Fuck it! I’m just gona take this as a comedy” the movie begins with Tim Madden, an ex bartender who aspires to become a writer; we never see him do either. He wakes up and writes down with shaving cream in the mirror the day that it is (28) goes downstairs and finds his Dad sitting in the kitchen waiting for him. Tim, who looks like he had a rough night and a bit hung-over, begins telling his Dad that he feels delusional and that he has two heads in a duffel bag locked in the cellar. In we go to the story of the film, which is mostly told through flashbacks. Tim had a relationship with a woman named Patty Larraine (Debra Sandlund) a self absorbed/shallow bitch who is only interested in money, sex and drugs. In the first flashback we see some of the parties she threw for friends, based mostly on cocaine and booze. Then were transported into a séance (summoning of spirits) why? Fuck I don’t know!! It’s fucking random. We later see Patty leave Tim for the chauffer and disappear for a third of the movie. Now we are introduced to Jessica Pond, an ex XXX star (porn for that matter) who is also only interested in Sex and Drugs. Tim drunk at a bar meets Jessica and her gay partner (we find out that later in the film) Tim invites both to his house, gives a really bad joke and tells her to give him a blowjob in front of her lover. I am not making this up, this is exactly what happens, and then it jumps to them having sex outs side his house, also in front of the lover.
After this scenario Jessica also disappears for an even larger amount of the film and we get introduced to Madeline Regency (Isabella Rossellini), his first wife; we find out from both of them that they wanted to have a swinger party with a Christian couple. Again WTF!? And it so happens to be this Christian woman is Patty Larraine, the one who left with the chauffer at the beginning. So these events take place before she leaves Tim for the driver.After a night of rough sex switch-o-roo, Patty falls for Tim, decided to marry a rich guy, make up a fake story to leave her Christian husband and re-marry only to get divorced again and get back with Tim. He as well decides to leave Madeline, who ends up marrying another guy who is the chief of police in Provincetown (where all this shit is taking place) Shit how confusing, No? Well it gets worse. After the flashbacks are over, we find out that Tim is still in love with Madeline and Patty. Madeline, who is married to the chief of police, gives Tim a letter saying that she believes her husband is having an affair with his wife Patty. This is where the glorious scene of OH GOD OH MAN takes place.In the end we find out that there was a drug dealing going on with Patty’s ex husband (the rich one) Patty was to take the money from the dealing and give it to her lover (the chief of police)But her ex husband finds out and kills Patty. Then, Jessica returns and kills her gay lover (we find out he is gay due to later read by the chief of police) she is also sleeping with the chief of police and thinks she gonna get a piece of the money and drugs. She also get killed, but by the chief instead. Later for some odd reason her head is cut off and buried in the woods. While the chief is burring the body, Patty gets excited and goes nude for the chief, and voila they do it there.
The chief of police decides somehow to put the blame on Tim, and get away with two counts of murder. This fails, because the chief gets a heart attack and ends up paralyzed. Yet his ego doesn’t die there, he tells Madeline (his wife) “I made you come sixteen times in one night” after he calls her small potatoes she shoots the bastard.Later Tim and his Dad get rid of all the bodies and throw them into the river. Madeline takes the drug money, shares it with Tim and move into a mansion….The End! But what happened to the chauffer? Well he is never mentioned again.
OH MAN! OH GOD was this movie so insanely bad! Yet I was laughing for all the one liners. Like the one I mentioned “I made you come sixteen times in one night” (link below) or “Your knife is in my dog" and "I just deep-sixed two heads” the whole thing is so absurd it’s great! I know again it seems contradictory, but it’s marvelous stupidity. The movie was in fact a box office failure (not surprised) made for 5 million, made only 858thousand…tsk tsk.But over the years it has gained a cult following for all the above mentioned.
DVD
Not only am I surprised this movie made it to DVD but I’m shocked they actually bothered remastering it and presenting it in a anamorphic widescreen. Very impressive, now I get to see OH GOD OH MAN in 1080p up converted.
Video
I was impressed with this MGM DVD, the colors are sharp, yet they leave a nice flat tone, no DNR (Digital Noise Reduction) as far I am concerned. So overall the movie looks quite 80’s yet refurbished..if that makes any sense
Audio
The audio was just average, a 2 channel surround sound. Then again not much goes around in this movie. So don’t worry too much about the sound
Bottom Line:
You know what? Buy it, yes its bad, and yes its nonsensical most of it. But, it’s just god damn hilarious. Whether it is unintentional or intentional, it rocks for being a fumbled disjointed mess. You will really enjoy how bizarre and crazy this is, a bit ahead of its time LOL
Stars: Tisa Farrow, Ian McCulloch & Richard Johnson
Genre: Horror
Running Time: 91 Mins
MPAA Rating: X (Horror Violence/Gore & Nudity)
Tagline: We Are Going To Eat You
Synopsis:
{According to IMDB}
"Strangers looking for a woman's father arrive at a tropical island where a doctor desperately searches for the cause and cure of a recent epidemic of the undead."
I remember there were a lot of good reviews for this movie. Many claimed it to be the best Italian Zombie movie. So as a Zombie aficionado, I had to check this one out and see for myself. But before we get into the actual movie, let’s talk about the title itself “Zombie 2”. My first thoughts were “Where is Zombie 1?” Well, there is no Zombie 1, this isn’t really a sequel. Actually it was only given the title of “Zombie 2” to cash in the success of George A. Romero’s Dawn of The Dead (78). Yet there is little to no connection between this and Dawn of the Dead. Due to this confusion, I ended up buying an older DVD version titled simply "Zombie" thinking there was a first movie.
The movie begins in New York, which it seems to me it’s perhaps the only scene shot in the U.S. Anyways, two officers are searching an abandoned boat. One of the officers gets brutally killed by one of our beloved Zombies (a pretty big one actually) after this incident, we are introduced to Mia Farrow’s character: Anne, who I feel did this movie only for the paycheck, she seems bored to death as I was. Anyways, she gets questioned by the police after the cops’ demise. She gets questioned due to her father; he was in fact the owner of this boat. Not knowing anything, the cops leave her alone. Yet, she snoops around the boat to see what her father was up to, while snooping she stumbles onto a reporter (Ian McCulloch) they find a note from her father explaining he has a strange disease and that he is an Island, trying to find a cure. So both Anne and the reporter decide to get in their boat, and search for Anne's Daddy. Little do they know this Island is filled with Zombies! Yay!
I got to say that the film itself is pretty overrated for a Zombie flick. There are "some" gruesome scenes. But don’t expect anything over the top here. To me it just didn’t deliver what I would be expecting from a Zombie flick (Gore, Guts, etc). Aside from the Zombie Shark fight (yes, there is a Zombie Fighting a Shark) and a gut retching eye ball scene, the rest just drags…especially the Zombies, boy are these one’s slow. I know a Zombie isn’t supposed to run, but damn I think a snail can beat these guys any day, big time! There’s a scene where the zombies come up from the grave, the sequence alone is just sooo freaking slow!! I had to slap myself a couple times to stay awake in this turkey. Hard to believe this was in UK’s “Video Nasty” Like I said, it was gruesome in some scenes. But nothing overly nasty, just one of those flicks that have gained cult status only for the scenes mentioned earlier
DVD:
Like I said before, I ended up getting the DVD titled “Zombie” thinking it was the first film. The edition I’m reviewing here is the Anchor Bay 2002 release. This DVD contains no Special Features not even a trailer. In fact the movie just starts right away after putting the DVD in. If you are a fan of the film or are curious about it, get the Media Blasters 2004 release, or better yet the Anchor Bay 25th Anniversary 2 Disc Special Edition. That’s if you are crazy about the movie; personally, I wouldn’t bother.
Video:
The movie is presented in a non-Anamorphic Widescreen 2:35:1. Which to be honest looks really shitty. There is grain all over the place; colors are inconsistent, most of the time. Not to mention that the DVD for some reason felt compressed. There was pixilation all over the screen. Then again I was watching this on a 42” Plasma Screen in Zoom mode. So it makes sense for the pixilation; overall the picture quality was horrible. I’ve seen better quality from dollar store DVD’s.
Audio:
Not much better than the video, the audio is a 2 channel mono. So if you are expecting a good surround mix…it’s not here. Again, if you want the picture and sound quality in better optimum, get the other editions mentioned
Bottom Line:
I say just rent it, or borrow it from someone who has it. I wouldn’t pay the 25 bucks for it. Plus I don’t think this movie will be airing on TV anytime soon. If it does, then there’s your chance to see it. But frankly, either skip it, or just see it so you can get what all the fuss is about…which isn’t much for that manner
(For Violence)![Absolon [VHS] Movie Poster](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_ugpAkE6bG3Rg2nuihGJzbUBHnQ6lFcksxSXZIk1tq_2-au2uid62WyAYu91IhyWH_kCLzcZZxCGnD239-WCELweoE-h7YG0AdZTHaGnVwedbBd22WBK0UXAR84ZA4XDbvO3BTAyUdkEJDYjA=s0-d "Absolon [VHS] Movie Poster")
